It's the first day of Summer 2021 and this is the first post on my new blog, "Madeline Ever After." I've created this site because as I've begun my MTF transition, I'm finding that I have a lot to say about what I'm feeling and experiencing and need a place to share. If what I share resonates with or helps others, all the better.
I'll start with sharing this photo, which I'm currently using as my profile pic for Gmail, Instagram, and this blog. It was taken about a month ago at one of my favorite restaurants in Long Beach, CA, out to dinner with my husband, Eric.
I felt beautiful that evening and safe and comfortable (for the most part) in that space, but this is not always the case. Although I love getting dressed up as my authentic self, I'm only about four months into my transition, and I know I don't "pass" yet. When I catch someone looking at me funny I tense up and assume a more "male" posture, which only makes things worse. I'm trying very hard to approach these events with grace and humor, but it's at times very challenging. Eric helps a lot, though; he's my rock and when I'm with him I know I'm safe.
At any rate, it was a lovely evening and I think this picture captures my joy in becoming Madeline. Still very much a work in progress, but getting closer every day.
ReplyDeleteThis post was not even two months ago, but already it seems like ages. It's now early August and I'm presenting full time, even at work. My look has changed quite a bit, and I am feeling more and more comfortable and confident in my ow skin. It's still hard, but getting less so every day. It's remarkable really how fast things are progressing. I guess when you want/need something badly enough, it takes on a momentum of its own.