"Wouldn't it be loverly"

During last Wednesday’s session, my therapist Juliana used EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) to help me begin dealing with some trauma from my past and some anxiety I’ve been experiencing more recently.  During this session, she had me think of a happy, calm place to envision myself in.  Almost immediately what came to mind was the image of a room (a home library, I think) I’ve been using for months as my virtual background for Zoom meetings I have to attend from home (below).

I love this image.  It reminds me of a similar sort of room we had in our home back in Massachusetts (pic below), which we left over a year ago for sunny California.  We called this room “the sitting room,” and it was more or less my sanctuary for the eight years we lived in the house.  It was my happy place, where I’d go to sit quietly alone and read, listen to music, or just collect my thoughts. My sitting room was located in a two-story addition that was built on to the back of the house, just behind the living room downstairs and gave us a fifth bedroom upstairs.  We do not have such a room in the home we’re currently renting in Long Beach, so I’m making do with the backyard, which is lovely and comfortable just about year-round, until we purchase a home here.  

I’m hopeful that the home we purchase will have a little space I can call my own.  Like that number from the 1964 musical production of Pygmalion, “My Fair Lady,” in which Audrey Hepburn’s character sings: "All I want is a room somewhere, far away from the cold night air, with one enormous chair, oh wouldn't it be loverly?"  Loverly, indeed.  Until then, I will conjure images of rooms like the ones below, and go there when I need to feel calm and at peace with myself and the world around me...  

Oh, and incidentally, I played Colonel Pickering in my High School's 1986 production of "My Fair Lady," even though I could have, should have, and would have rocked the role of Eliza Doolittle... Just saying...